Beloved by the Alien Bodyguard: An Alien Abduction Romance (The Novans Book 16) by Ashlyn Hawkes

Beloved by the Alien Bodyguard: An Alien Abduction Romance (The Novans Book 16) by Ashlyn Hawkes

Author:Ashlyn Hawkes [Hawkes, Ashlyn]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-04-26T18:30:00+00:00


11

Nax

Making love to Julie all night long should leave me exhausted and spent.

I love everything about last night.

Holding her.

Kissing her.

Making sweet, tender love to her.

Making her come with my cock, my fingers, my tongue.

But now, as she slumbers in my arms, all I feel is shame and guilt.

Shame at how I had taken advantage of her innocence.

Shame for all the months we spent apart when we could have been enjoying each other.

Shame at how weak I am for giving in and touching when I shouldn't have.

Work should come first.

Always.

My job is too important.

The guilt was worse. Guilt that I had been so selfish, so blind to never see what I was missing out on until it was too late. Guilt that I had been too scared to make a move sooner, guilt that by the time I did, it may already be too late to make things right.

On top of all that, there was also the nagging feeling of responsibility for putting Julie in this situation in the first place. We should never have gone down that road in the first place, and now here we are, literally tangled in each other's arms when we most definitely shouldn't have ever given in to our desire.

She's beautiful, smart, and driven. There are Novan farmers. One of them should have been the one to love her and earn her love. Not me. A farmer would understand her far more than I ever could, but that is not meant to be my life.

I am a guard, a bodyguard, and that is all I ever am.

In fact, I should be guarding Julie's heart so that she might find love and never be harmed.

But that lover should not be me.

I can only sit there, dwelling on my own misery as Julie sleeps peacefully beside me, blissfully unaware of everything she has been dragged into because of me.

Like it or not, we did something wrong, something that could tear us apart, and I can't help but feel responsible.

I should have been stronger.

My feelings for her... They aren't enough. Not enough to turn me away from my duty.

All of the Earthling women are too precious for me to be consumed by one and one alone. It isn't far from the others.

I'm afraid I will become too consumed in Julie that I will forsake my duty, and what then? What if one of the women or, worse, one of the Kurian babies should become hurt because of my distraction?

It's a burden that weighs heavily on my conscience and it fills me with shame and regret.

I thought only of myself when I hatched this plan with Julie, not realizing how much it would cost someone else down the line.

The reality of what we've done sets in like an icy chill and I'm desperate to make amends.

But I know it will never be enough. Nothing can make up for what we've done.

All I can do is live with the consequences of my actions and try harder in the future to do right by Earthling women and Novans.



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